June 8, 2005

Sorting It Out

Most of my attention and energy this week has been going towards supporting a friend whose marriage just fell apart. He thought they working things out -- but turns out he was wrong. This is a person who is always there for you and it just goes to show that something like this lets you know who your real friends are, and who's just using you. When you're at your lowest and reaching out to those you've always been there for, and they suddenly aren't around, it's a real eye opener.

Reading the above, it sounds so calm, when inside I'm just seething. I'm like a mama bear when it comes to those I care about, and hurt when they're betrayed. You wish you could do more than just be a shoulder and actually be able to make things better. Yes, I know I can't, but that doesn't stop me from feeling useless.

Posted by Ithildin at June 8, 2005 9:27 AM | PROCURE FINE OLD WORLD ABSINTHE

May God bless you with strength, Ith, while you're helping your friend through this difficult time. And may He bless your friend with peace. So sad. /hug

Posted by: Princess Jami at June 8, 2005 12:47 PM

hugs to you and your friend.

I have been there as the crying shoulder, and I know it's hard. I know you don't need advice, and it probably won't matter in your situation anyway, but remember that you're a friend, not a therapist, so if you feel like you're getting in over your head helping your friend deal with his pain, you probably are.

Just let it go. Seething won't help anybody...

Posted by: caltechgirl at June 8, 2005 9:39 PM

Yeah, I've been down this path before, and I know I have to keep some detachment, or I'll be a wreck.

Posted by: Ith at June 8, 2005 10:11 PM

I know how you feel, and it's rough. Be there when you're needed, but remember that it's ultimately his problem, and he needs to work through it.

Easier said than done!

Posted by: docjim505 at June 9, 2005 8:11 AM