Absinthe & Cookies (a bit bitter, a bit sweet)

Blame Lori

Total and absolute blame for this goes to Lori (and Tom, of course):

The Scientology Test

Have you driven anyone insane?
* Yes, so I don't drive anymore.

Have you ever killed the wrong person?
* Not on purpose.

Is anybody looking for you?
* I sure hope not, 'cus my hair is a mess!

Have you ever set a poor example?
* No, but I've followed Lori's poor example in answering these questions!

Did you come to Earth for evil purposes?
* All I want is to train bunny rabbits everywhere to balance pancakes on their head. If that's wrong, then I don't wanna be right.

Are you in hiding?
* You tell me.

Have you systematically set up mysteries?
* No but I've built them -- where the vampires roam even.

Have you ever made a practice of confusing people?
* No, I decided I was more of a "Ministry of Silly Walks" sorta gal.

Have you ever philosophized when you should have acted instead?
* No -- I'm method, baby.

Have you ever gone crazy?
* Nosey much?

Have you ever sought to persuade someone of your insanity?
* Hey, it's them that are crazy! I'm normal.

Have you ever deserted, or betrayed, a great leader?
* Yeah. When I discovered there was no GAP in Rohan, I told Aragorn that my heart just wasn't in it anymore and ran off with Eomer.

Have you ever smothered a baby?
*No, but I have poached one lightly in a nice pear reduction.

Do you deserve to have any friends?
* Define "deserve".

Have you ever castrated anyone?
* Only a little.

Do you deserve to be enslaved?
* Again, define "deserve"

Is there any question on this list I had better not ask you again?
*Any more questions with "deserve" in them.

Have you ever tried to make the physical universe less real?
* Just last week in fact!

Have you ever zapped anyone?
* Only when they [cough] deserve it.

Have you ever had a body with a venereal disease? If so, did you spread it?
* Yeah, one of those folks I accidently killed, you know, the ones from the question way up at the top? Well, one of those bodies had something nasty, so I ran them through a composting machine, just like in that Doctor Who episode, and I made a really nice mulch and spread it all over my neighbourhood.

Posted by Ithildin at June 28, 2005 11:46 AM | PROCURE FINE OLD WORLD ABSINTHE